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The Pumpkin Patch

 
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RFlower
Alfa 33


Joined: 17 Feb 2004
Posts: 432
Location: S of France

PostPosted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 8:46 pm    Post subject: The Pumpkin Patch Reply with quote

Police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22 year old white male resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch 11:38 p.m. on Friday night.
On Monday, at the Gwinnett County courthouse, Lawrence was charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public indecency, and public intoxication.
The suspect explained that he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way home from a drinking session when he decided to stop,
"You know how a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around for miles - or at least I thought there wasn't anyone around" he stated in a telephone interview.
Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purpose, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged 'need.'

"Guess I was really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment.
In the process of doing the deed, Lawrence failed to notice an approaching police car and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor. "I walked up to Lawrence and he's just banging away at this pumpkin."
Officer Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence.

"I said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you're having Kittens with a pumpkin?"

He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then he looked me straight in the face and said..... "A pumpkin?

F*ck me..... is it midnight already??"
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Dick Flower, Nr. Carcassonne. '94 Trofeo 1.4 ie (F), '93 Imola 1.3/1.4 ie (now for breaking) (F), '91 1.7 ie (GB)(spare car), '86 Sprint 1.5 QV (F). '87 VW Syncro camper (F), '73 NSU Ro80 (F), '99 Fiat Seicento (F)
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lee16v
16 Valve


Joined: 29 Jun 2005
Posts: 1429
Location: Devon, UK

PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2007 12:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

That's a quick witted answer to an embarrassing situation Embarassed


The only thing i'll say in his defence is at least pumpkins don't nag, spend your money or complain about headaches Wink
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